Why blog?
I saw my friend Blake was blogging and I read her blog and I was all like "My shit'd be a lot more interesting than that." (Seriously, it is, check hers out www.blakelroberts.blogspot.com ; all she talks about is her bird Roxy). So hurr it is. My blog. To all those who laugh when I say things like "I'll save it for the memoir" or "this would make a great chapter in my life story" or "this song would sound great during the closing credits of the movie about my life"; to all those people "BLOG YOU!"
Today? Today was a little better than yesterday. My boss didn't yell at me. That was cool. It's not that I care that he yells at me, because I really don't. Of course I want to do my job well, but I am well aware that the correlation between how good of a job I do and my boss' temper is not a direct one. I forget how this would be represented mathematically but I think it could involve a graph and one of those "not equal to" signs.
Anyway, so when he gets angry at me, it's kind of like when a Jimmy Eat World CD skips. Jimmy Eat World sucks as it is. When a Jimmy Eat World CD skips, it REALLY fucking sucks. For those who don't know JEW...
SIX FEET UNDER (to fellow Hollywoodians: notice how you capitalize titles to TV shows and movies now?) really sucks and is really pretentious. If you are unfortunate enough to have seen an entire episode (like one where they show two dudes fucking) and are watching TV and happen to stumble upon another one you might not have seen and decide to give it a chance and then there is another scene of two dudes fucking, that REALLY sucks and is REALLY pretentious. That's kind of like how my relationship with my boss is.
I almost quit on Monday. He was being so condescending and blamed his own tardiness to a meeting on me even though I reminded him thrice....THRICE! I threw my headset down and was like "I've had enough of this fucking shit." I realized I shouldn't quit. I couldn't let him break me. He was like "your name is Toby Reynolds." I was like "my name is Kunta Kinte." CRACK! He was like "your name is Toby Reynolds." I was like "my name is Kunta Kinte." CRACK! He was like "your name is Toby Reynolds." I was like "my name is Kunta Kinte." CRACK!
I took three deep breaths and wrote an email to HR. I met with the HR guy and he calmed me down. "Everyone at this company is fucking insane. At the end of the day, just do a good job and tell him to go fuck himself." Obviously I don't do that to his face, but it feels so good.
Toward the end of the day today, I had to hit up the restroom. I walked up to the urinal which sits next to another urinal separated by a divider. At the right urinal was a boardmember peeing. He also happened to be my dad's agent. These situations crack me up. It's one thing to walk into a bathroom and have three people shitting at once because let's face it, unless you really pay attention to shoes, you have no idea who is squatting. However, when you are at a urinal, even if you don't make eye contact, you can see the person out of the corner of your eye. You almost have to acknowledge them, right? I mean, what's the protocol when you are peeing next to someone. If there's a divider, I think acknowledgement is appropriate since there's no chance of the person thinking you are trying to sneak a peak.
A few weeks ago, I told my boss I had to go to the restroom. I pulled up to the urinal and unzipped. The door opens. I see a person out the corner of my eye make their way to the right urinal; dark complexion; tall (not as tall as me). I turned me head slightly. "Don't worry, I'm not checking up on you," said my boss. Me: "Hahaha, _____ I would never think that. Come on now" (<----SO AWKWARD). I mean, as it is, he and I don't have real, human conversation with him outside of the bathroom, away from a porcelain piss receptacle. How the fuck am I supposed to interact with him while my dick is hanging out and I am facing a wall? Advice?
Anyway, I watched this great flick tonight with Sascha. AALTRA. Check out the website www.aaltra-roadmovie.com Watch the video clips http://www.aaltra-roadmovie.com/english/accueil.php
I saw it in Ireland at the Ireland Film Institute. It's a French/Belgian film but it takes place in France and Finland. Very subtle humor but fucking hilarious. Seriously. Watch the clips. I had California Chicken Cafe for dinner. Didn't go to the gym tonight cuz I went to hang with Sascha. I will go in the morning before work.
Got the new Kanye album. On first listen, I'm not thinking it's as hot as COLLEGE DROPOUT. It's hot though. The song with Paul Wall is the off the meat hook. The skits are hilarious. One is about a fraternity called Broke Phi Broke and they do step dances saying things:
BROKE PHI BROKE we ain't got it
We can't...afford...no gas NO WE CAN'T AFFORD IT
I love Kanye. Maybe he will buy my "Prep Hop" idea. Oh, you ain't know? I will save that for tomorrow. Until then. Keep it trill.
Wanna hug it out?
www.lhiob.com
http://www.lhiob.com/downloads/lhiob_radioedit.mp3
I saw my friend Blake was blogging and I read her blog and I was all like "My shit'd be a lot more interesting than that." (Seriously, it is, check hers out www.blakelroberts.blogspot.com ; all she talks about is her bird Roxy). So hurr it is. My blog. To all those who laugh when I say things like "I'll save it for the memoir" or "this would make a great chapter in my life story" or "this song would sound great during the closing credits of the movie about my life"; to all those people "BLOG YOU!"
Today? Today was a little better than yesterday. My boss didn't yell at me. That was cool. It's not that I care that he yells at me, because I really don't. Of course I want to do my job well, but I am well aware that the correlation between how good of a job I do and my boss' temper is not a direct one. I forget how this would be represented mathematically but I think it could involve a graph and one of those "not equal to" signs.
Anyway, so when he gets angry at me, it's kind of like when a Jimmy Eat World CD skips. Jimmy Eat World sucks as it is. When a Jimmy Eat World CD skips, it REALLY fucking sucks. For those who don't know JEW...
SIX FEET UNDER (to fellow Hollywoodians: notice how you capitalize titles to TV shows and movies now?) really sucks and is really pretentious. If you are unfortunate enough to have seen an entire episode (like one where they show two dudes fucking) and are watching TV and happen to stumble upon another one you might not have seen and decide to give it a chance and then there is another scene of two dudes fucking, that REALLY sucks and is REALLY pretentious. That's kind of like how my relationship with my boss is.
I almost quit on Monday. He was being so condescending and blamed his own tardiness to a meeting on me even though I reminded him thrice....THRICE! I threw my headset down and was like "I've had enough of this fucking shit." I realized I shouldn't quit. I couldn't let him break me. He was like "your name is Toby Reynolds." I was like "my name is Kunta Kinte." CRACK! He was like "your name is Toby Reynolds." I was like "my name is Kunta Kinte." CRACK! He was like "your name is Toby Reynolds." I was like "my name is Kunta Kinte." CRACK!
I took three deep breaths and wrote an email to HR. I met with the HR guy and he calmed me down. "Everyone at this company is fucking insane. At the end of the day, just do a good job and tell him to go fuck himself." Obviously I don't do that to his face, but it feels so good.
Toward the end of the day today, I had to hit up the restroom. I walked up to the urinal which sits next to another urinal separated by a divider. At the right urinal was a boardmember peeing. He also happened to be my dad's agent. These situations crack me up. It's one thing to walk into a bathroom and have three people shitting at once because let's face it, unless you really pay attention to shoes, you have no idea who is squatting. However, when you are at a urinal, even if you don't make eye contact, you can see the person out of the corner of your eye. You almost have to acknowledge them, right? I mean, what's the protocol when you are peeing next to someone. If there's a divider, I think acknowledgement is appropriate since there's no chance of the person thinking you are trying to sneak a peak.
A few weeks ago, I told my boss I had to go to the restroom. I pulled up to the urinal and unzipped. The door opens. I see a person out the corner of my eye make their way to the right urinal; dark complexion; tall (not as tall as me). I turned me head slightly. "Don't worry, I'm not checking up on you," said my boss. Me: "Hahaha, _____ I would never think that. Come on now" (<----SO AWKWARD). I mean, as it is, he and I don't have real, human conversation with him outside of the bathroom, away from a porcelain piss receptacle. How the fuck am I supposed to interact with him while my dick is hanging out and I am facing a wall? Advice?
Anyway, I watched this great flick tonight with Sascha. AALTRA. Check out the website www.aaltra-roadmovie.com Watch the video clips http://www.aaltra-roadmovie.com/english/accueil.php
I saw it in Ireland at the Ireland Film Institute. It's a French/Belgian film but it takes place in France and Finland. Very subtle humor but fucking hilarious. Seriously. Watch the clips. I had California Chicken Cafe for dinner. Didn't go to the gym tonight cuz I went to hang with Sascha. I will go in the morning before work.
Got the new Kanye album. On first listen, I'm not thinking it's as hot as COLLEGE DROPOUT. It's hot though. The song with Paul Wall is the off the meat hook. The skits are hilarious. One is about a fraternity called Broke Phi Broke and they do step dances saying things:
BROKE PHI BROKE we ain't got it
We can't...afford...no gas NO WE CAN'T AFFORD IT
I love Kanye. Maybe he will buy my "Prep Hop" idea. Oh, you ain't know? I will save that for tomorrow. Until then. Keep it trill.
Wanna hug it out?
www.lhiob.com
http://www.lhiob.com/downloads/lhiob_radioedit.mp3
posted by D Dubs at 1:00 AM
2 Comments:
I've always been jealous guys can pee together... seeing as it's something girls normally do (at least in Sweden), they go in like 5 at a time. But now I've noticed in more and more places in Stockholm how they actually put TWO toilets next to eachother in the same bathroom!
Awesome! God bless Sweden.
Alright D Dubs... You called me out. No love for my blog, I see how it is. You can't compare our blogs, I mean you studied journalism and I studied computer science!! That is a big equals sign with a line through it.
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